Camp is in equal parts absurd and touching. The push and pull between moments of laughter and great vulnerability thaw the heart like jumping into a cold plunge after sitting in the hot tub. I was woken from my slumber to the SpongeBob squarepants theme song sung loudly by a group of campers that woke up early enough to decide it was a good idea. If I had woken up that early I’m sure I would have agreed it was a good idea and sung with them but life is about choosing your battles and the cost of even less sleep outweighs the benefits to me personally. Later in the day we pranked our advisor by hiding in the bathroom, something we had planned without his knowledge a day earlier. The bathroom, to quote my words at the time, “Smelled like doodoo cacka”. But it was worth it to see the look on the faces of all the poor hapless campers who wandered in while we were waiting for our trick to be discovered.
Later we did Seeing Seen, one of the more difficult and rewarding parts of camp for me. We split into small groups each with campers and a few staff members and each person had a chance to share something happening in their life and ask for support. Emotional intensity can be difficult for me, something I’ve been working on, and while I do wish I would have done more grounding beforehand I listened in an empathetic way and connected to the campers in my group. It also made me remember how much camp was an escape for me in previous years. This session I feel genuinely excited to return to my normal life, cherishing the new friendships I’ve made, and I’m proud of myself for how far I’ve come as I finish out my last year of camp.
Oh and I forgot to mention it was twin day and everyone matched outfits! For twin day this year I went all in. Last year I brought one of the many axolotl onesies I have in my house. Don’t ask why I have so many. Last year I also promised that if I came back in a car I would bring more and so I did. Me and two of my friends donned these glorious robes after dinner. They were awesome.
After dinner (and the donning of the axolotl onesies) was the Angel walk. Everyone doing it, campers and staff, have a chance to walk through a tunnel of participants with their eyes closed while people whisper nice things in their ear. This explanation doesn’t really do it justice and kind of sounds creepy (cult jokes incoming) but I promise its awesome. I was one of the last to go and I was already so emotional from saying sweet things to people I knew and loved and people I hoped to know better that I nearly cried when it was my turn to close my eyes. When you do the angel walk you often learn something unexpected about yourself, something obvious to others but difficult for you to see. The ego boost is crazy basically. In a good way.
After Angel walk there was fire circle. I love fire. I really love fire. Fire is my normal pill. Humans have literally evolved to sit around fires and tell stories and sing songs and the shit that we’re doing in the modern day is not that and makes us miserable and we should all just sit around fires more often that’s my hot take thank you for listening to my Ted talk.
Sorry I got sidetracked. Fire circle is pretty simple . Big fire. Big circle. Songs, stories, poems, jokes, basically anything anyone wants to share, and people share some awesome stuff. Camp is a place where I’m continually awed by the artistic talent of a bunch of kids who don’t have to sit in a classroom all day and maybe have time to actually do what they love or something.
I’ve been to two fire circles previously, but this one was my favorite by far and probably my favorite experience this session. I stayed until long after the event was over and most people had left to go to sleep or strike off on some other adventure. Cuddled up with a few friends, watching the fire slowly die as I was serenaded by old camp songs I felt a sense of belonging deep in my soul that has lingered with me ever since. It was pretty cool I guess. Or whatever.
Finally, I brushed my teeth. I waited in line to spit in the sink and made funny faces in the mirror and laughed and hugged and wished everyone a goodnight. I’m culminating this year. I won’t be able to come back as a camper. I am ready to culminate, I really am. I’m ready to close this book and open another. I’m ready for the first day of the rest of my life. But I’ll miss everyone here, and I’m so grateful for all that camp has given me. Thank you all so much.
I love you.
Orion Moss, camper and Culminator